Relationships come and go, but cheese is forever.
Mozzarella, American, cheddar, feta – these are just a few of the many prime examples of the true loves of our lives. Boyfriends and girlfriends? Ha! Thanks, but no thanks. Unless your significant other is bringing you ooey-gooey melted, cheesy treats on a daily basis, I’m going to have to pass on the whole relationship thing for now.
Cheese is much more than just an accessory you add to your food to make it taste 100x better. Think of everything you ate today - was cheese part of at least one meal? I can guarantee 99% of the people reading this all answered that question with yes.
If you're single, lonely, and constantly hungry – I have the answer to your problems: cheese. You are probably thinking, "has this girl ever been in any sort of relationship???" Actually, yes I have. Let me tell you, cheese has stuck by my side through thick and thin (slices). Through the good times, the bad times, the times where I thought I wasn’t even in the mood for pizza or mac & cheese (it was a low point), cheese has always forced it’s way into my heart and melted away my problems.
Think of all the forms of cheese, and then think of humans. We have slices, wedges, sticks, even blocks of cheese. We even have cheese in a damn CAN!!! You can go wild and spray that stuff on everything (maybe even on your ex-boyfriend). However, there is only one form of humans and well, they are not always the greatest. Cheese will be there for you when the love of your life isn't, which is 98% of the time. You can go to sleep at night knowing that cheese isn’t leaving you anytime soon, and that is a great feeling. In fact, the longer it ages the BETTER IT IS. How many of you can say that about your boyfriend? Didn’t think so.
Don’t get me wrong, relationships are great. We all enjoy the idea of being in love and going on cute little dates to post all over your Instagram. Post a picture of some baked ziti and you’ll get the same number of likes as a picture of you and your boyfriend – scratch that, you’ll get more (I’ve tested it). Nachos, pizza, calzones, hello??! How can anyone say no to any of those? Cheese won't break up with you and you'll never break up with cheese. That is a fact.